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The Delay

I want to apologize to Bill and all the readers disappointed by the delay in my getting part 5 up.

It’s been due to three reasons.

First, I was a little burnt out and spent from writing up part 4, which was a monster of a post at 20,000+ words, and recharging mentally took a little longer than I expected.

Second, real world commitments have unexpectedly ramped up in the past two weeks.

Third, the organization of all the ideas is taking more time than I expected. This piece is a compilation of a lot of ideas, and I want them organized in as coherent and linear a fashion possible; I don’t want to just toss them at the reader haphazardly. It’s ironic, because one of the nuggets of advice I give in the piece is about the pitfalls of perfectionism, yet I guess I’m still not good at taking my own advice on that front.

It should finally be completed this weekend, and I assure you it will be worth the wait. Thanks for the patience.

19 Responses to “The Delay”


  1. Part 4 was so fascinating that I’ve been checking back here daily for the past month waiting for the next installment. Though, you should definitely take your time and get your thoughts correct. I suppose you cannot rush wisdom.

    “If I were wiser I would not be so experienced. If I were not so experienced I would not be so wise.” – Eidolon Farrago


  2. Here’s a topic I’d like you to address:

    To what extent do you ascribe “agency” to people. To what extent do they control their actions versus their actions are determined by their circumstances (genes, environment, etc).

    I’d especially like to hear your opinion on what agency you ascribe to women. Before modern times it seems like they had little agency, and most of their young lives they don’t need agency. The faculty of agency seems underdeveloped in women.


  3. I’ve been thinking about agency a lot too.


  4. You’re blog is probably the most profound I’ve come across on the net. I really like that you do not constrain your posts; you make them as long as they need to be.

    In particular this series has helped me make sense of quite a few stuff in my life. Until I read your disclaimer you could have been a Phd in these topics, where did you learn so much?

    Thank you,
    Alejandro


  5. BTW I dont think anyone can be “disappointed” by the delay on the series. It just builds anticipation. This is brutally good stuff.


  6. This current series has been excellent, and I think everybody would rather you take your time and do it right. Looking forward to it!


  7. Anticipation is the correct word to describe it.


  8. For those of you checking back daily, sign up by email! You will get each post as soon as it is written and posted.


  9. In particular this series has helped me make sense of quite a few stuff in my life. Until I read your disclaimer you could have been a Phd in these topics, where did you learn so much?

    I did three things. I made friends with people who seemed functional and observed them and picked their brains a lot and decided to take a lot of constructive advice without being defensive about it. The second thing I did was whenever I found a very good book that was helpful, I would read the notes and bibiography and try to read as many of the books it cited as possible. I’d also go to Amazon and look under the section that says “People who liked this book also liked…” So good books keep leading to more good books in that way. The books weren’t just restricted to psychology, I also read religion, New Age, personal development, productivity, sales, anything. Lastly, I had to build up a lot of experience observing and applying what I learned from real life mentors and books by reality testing and reflecting on said reality testing. Asking myself questions like “how does the advice I’ve gotten and the books I’ve in my life relate to what happened tonight?” And so on and so on. I’m thinking of doing a series of posts titled “How to Get Smarter” that describes my methods.


  10. You should definitely do that series. I’m on a tidal wave of personal growth that I’ve been riding for the past 6 months and have no intention of stopping any time soon. A series like this would be incredibly useful in accelerating and/or increasing the quality of the process.

  11. Shatteredperceptions on April 6th, 2012 at 3:22 PM

    It’s interesting to learn where you picked up a lot of info. For me …I got thrust into weird life experiences, sometimes out of my control. Like for instance I grew up both in city and country and suburbs. I’ve also had the chance to be around all types and did listen a lot too, like rich, poor, different classes, races and ideologies. I have attended many denominations of religion and yes, am an avid reader. Plus role models helped and my belief in God believe it or not.

    LOL ever notice how men just ignore good women? I mean not to bash I comprehend where it may be coming from. When I got rejected by the “hot, perfect” few men I desired while single I got to the do all men suck based on the one or two I want stage.

    Yes, women have agency too, the good ones. Maybe not the superstars or anything. And good people don’t spend hours online moping. And yes there are good looking people with great hearts too. Anyway, thought Id answer the men above…hope you dont mind from a woman. Looking foward to your next blog post.


  12. By all due respect for your nice work and your contribution through this blog for all readers, I found myself pretty much perfectly described in the 4th Part of ‘the’ Reader’s letter and hence I’m checking your blog almost daily for a month now to finally see what you suggest for getting out of that circle.

    However, even though you said it, you couldn’t come up with the last solving part, which you excused here. Still, now its almost Monday in the US and you still didn’t publish the last part. I find that very offensive( / disrespectful), since I’m, as I said, intensely waiting for the last part, which I’ve told myself will give me at least a guideline how to proceed now.

    If you announce a delay, please don’t set up a new date which you don’t stay within, thats just bulls***.

    I know that I’m barely entitles to critic you, since there is nothing I give to you to claim there is any kind of denied service by you, but still your thorough 4th part got me thinking a lot and I almost had a mental breakdown, because there were different things adding up …and then the breaking point, learning that my whole reality is messed up by pickup and all that pain I’ve had with women was because I’ve fallen into that trap you’ve described.
    So please understand that for some of us it(the article) is actually a really big deal.


  13. I’ve also been looking forward to and eagerly waiting for the last instalment of your answer. Congratulations to this blog, you’ve made it to the top of my browser favorites (as in “first thing after starting the pc”)!!! I’ve been reading a lot of manosphere and pickup related blogs and would say I’ve swallowed the red pill, but there are still eye-openers such as your blog out there to show us how deep the rabbit hole really goes…


  14. This series has been abnormally amazing and captivating… But, I feel pretty ridiculous checking this website every few hours in hopes that part 5 is up…


  15. Clemens – the problem with the red pill analogy is that there’s always a redder pill out there. Always.


  16. Haha John why not just subscribe so you can get notified? Anyway, it’s up.


  17. Why is it whenever a statement starts with some form of “with all due respect,” it’s usually followed by some indeed disrespectful stuff?


  18. Ricky:

    Part 5 doesn’t seem to be in your RSS feed (neither is part 4, now that I look). Not the end of the world, just FYI.


  19. Thanks for the heads up. I looked it up and it seems to have to do with the size of the posts which makes sense, as they’re pretty huge